Goodbyes to Friends (20th July)

One of the hardest things about coming back here, is having to say my goodbyes again so soon. I think I cried for the last month I was in Uganda before, as it took me that long to say goodbye to everyone. This time, I have only been here for a month, so it has been like saying hi and bye in one breath.

Last night I said my goodbyes to a group of my former colleagues. We managed to all get together and have an evening of reminiscing, catching up and plenty of laughs. It was very pleasing to hear the progress some of them have made in their projects and although some of them have now left the organisation, the skills they learnt are being put to use in their other work. I have often questioned whether my year here had made any impact. Last night, I felt like it had.

As I prepare to leave tomorrow, I have mixed feelings. I feel way more contented with myself now – like I have finished this chapter and now (finally) am ready to move on fully to other things. But I am also sad that I have not been able to see some of the people I really wanted to catch up with. One of those people is Sulaina, a friend I used to play netball with. Her phone is not connected anymore and I have been unable to trace her. Making this even sadder is that I never got to say goodbye to her the first time as she was hit by a car on her way to come to the airport with me. Another is one of my father figures here. I’m not sure if I’m able to say his name as he is in government (and there are funny laws about that), but he is currently in Juba for the peace talks and so isn’t around. At least I have been able to speak to him on phone but it is one of my regrets that I haven’t been able to see him.

I am, however, looking forward to going home. I can’t wait to see my family and getting back into my work. Although I learnt many a lesson during my 12 months here and some of my experiences made it hard for me to settle in at home, I think I have finally learnt to combine my two worlds – to use the angst I feel at my own “white privilege” in a positive way – and rather than be consumed by guilt, to use that angst to change the things and help the people around me.

Signing off from the Pearl of Africa,
Aussie Amy